What I Learned About Networking My First Year in Sales (Hint: It’s Not About You)

When I landed my first sales job, I thought I had networking figured out—show up, shake hands, hand out business cards, and boom, instant business. My first event was a local business mixer. I walked in with my stack of cards ready, but after a few awkward introductions and some polite nods, I realized people weren’t exactly racing to follow up with me. I went home thinking, This is going to be harder than I thought.

A few weeks later, a seasoned rep on my team gave me some advice that flipped the whole thing for me: “Stop trying to sell and start trying to understand.” At the next event, I walked in with a new game plan—ask questions, listen more than I talk, and forget about pitching. I asked people about their business, how they got started, and what challenges they were facing. To my surprise, conversations flowed more naturally, and people seemed genuinely interested in talking to me.

Over time, I learned that networking isn’t an event—it’s a habit. After each conversation, I’d follow up with something small but meaningful. Maybe I’d send an article that related to their industry, introduce them to someone who could help them, or just check in to see how things were going. These touches didn’t feel like “sales moves”—they felt like I was simply staying connected. Slowly, people began reaching out to me, not just the other way around.

Now, I’m intentional about where I spend my networking time. I focus on events, groups, and communities where the people I want to know actually spend their time. It’s less about collecting contacts and more about building relationships that matter. Looking back, my rookie mistake was thinking networking was about me. The truth is, it’s about them—and when you focus on helping others win, the wins come back to you in ways you never expected.